Three Years Musturbating...

“What Is the Essence of Pleading for It from a Girl Yet I can Satisfy Myself?” 

By Frank Oduor and Chris Wallace.

Photo Courtesy.

Many youths especially in their early and late twenties are suffering from many forms of mental slaveries and immorality just to fight depression.

Some have got into sexual immorality, drug and substance abuse, and many forms of Ungodly acts that eat them deep, some as a result of depression while some due to peer pressure.

During our stroll around the busy city estates, one of our reporter meets a 27 year old man who says he has something to share as long as we keep his identity concealed as doing otherwise would destroy his reputation.

We agree to his requests and set a date for the big interview with the man we will name John to conceal his identity.

 

Our interviewee is a worker in one of the companies in Nairobi and stays within Pipeline estate in Embakasi East.

John who is remorseful in his appearance probably of the memories of his past says that he didnt realize how he fell into masturbation after breaking up with his girlfriend. 

This was my lowest point, l lost my self-esteem, confidence, peace of mind, in fact l lost myself, recounts John. 

 “l tried to move on with my life but it became difficult because girls kept on rejecting me every time l tried finding another girl, I don't know why but maybe because l was not myself then, you know girls! adds the now a father to one child.

He says that it is after the break up with the girl whom he really loved that he developed some feeling of loneliness. This pushed him to find the television as his new companion where he started watching some series just to buy time. 

 In the process a friend recommended to him some series called Life On Top which he says that contains explicit and erotic content in nature. He says at first he found the film to be very erotic but enjoying, little did he know this was the beginning of his journey to destruction and addiction.

 The series is porn, I couldn't fight the sexual urge any longer and since l lived by alone in a single room in pipeline, I started masturbating while watching this film, he recounts.

John says that with time the act became addictive up to a point he used to do masturbation for up to ten times in a day.

 However he adds that he felt guilty and sad every time he finished doing the act yet he never stopped.  

He further shifted his internet gratification to watching porn which to today he holds that he doesnt think if there is any sex video that he didnt have access to. 

John took a notch higher and started following porn celebrities on social media.

He masturbated for three years and still he couldnt find himself a girlfriend. To cool and quench his thirst, he resorted to use of his palms.

"What's the essence in pleading with a girl for sex yet l can still help myself?" He used to question himself rhetorically.

He says that he lost interest in girls and when friends could ask why he was not dating; his reply could be that relationships are expensive.

Turn Around

Johns battle took a u-turn one day when he went clubbing after getting his end month salary. 

In the club he spotted some fine girl who later came to his table to join him in the drinking spree. Since it was end month he decided to spoil the lady along.

“It was end month so l had no problem buying a few more drinks and let me just tell you this, by this time l had like four years without any intercourse with a girl. He confesses.

The lady just like somebody who was reading his mind immediately asked him, uko na ngapi bradhe? Rooms ziko tu hapo kando, ukinipea pesa mzuri nitakupea bila haraka. John narrates. 

  

Though he had never paid for sex before he was tempted and agreed to the girls proposal after which they settled for a fee of 200 shillings inclusive of the room service. 

He adds that he decided to enjoy his money which he had worked for.

 

However the hard and turn taking point was during the steamy affair when he could not rise to the          occasion.

“I had just started doing it then l heard the girl saying to me, si uingize nini vizuri?,na hii nini yako kwani haiwezi simama vizuri? Skuma hio kitu bro vile uko mdogo ivi hauna nguvu? Within seconds me nlishamwaga manze. He narrates laughing.

The girl immediately ridiculed her and got a turn off when he ejaculated prematurely. She dressed up and told him that she had other important things to attend to.

On his way out of the room the service attendants shouted to him to pick his balance since he didnt even finish a minute with the lady. 

He swore to himself that he would never again bed another girl any soon. He went home depressed and he made his mind to stop masturbation. This was never going to be easy obviously.

He decided to visit many online sites to see if he could get something to help him stop but he couldnt find.

 

 

 “l felt, let me try God, so every time l felt like masturbating l knelt down and prayed to God to take that urge away and just by doing that l started improving l also started going to church, reading novels and bibles in my free time. He says happily.

John quit watching porn and masturbating. He now has a girlfriend with whom they have a six year old son and he believes were it not God, he could not have made it.

“My guys stay away from masturbation and if you are in it man, try to stop it because it's only a disadvantage to your sex life, he concludes as we wind the interview.